Check out this blog!

This is SUCH a fantastic blog posting.
Also, I really agree with it, and am really glad that MEN are realizing this too. It makes me feel better. I am in NO way bashing boys at all. I just think that this man adequately explained a lot of what I know a lot of GIRLS and some women feel. I love my male counterparts, but society makes it okay for this to happen.
Happy reading,

Pin Up Photo Shoot

I have a lot of dreams and things I want to do in life. Things to achieve, see, better myself. My magaizne is one of my biggest dreams, second to having a family and being a mom. I want to spread the idea to be yourself, have confidence and be love.

One of my simple, small dreams has always been to be a pin up girl. I've always wanted to have a 1950s photo shoot or an entire 1950s wardrobe (preferably both). It's my fashion - vintage. I'd love to own all vintage inspired clothing. Simpler time fashionwise...not skanky.

Anyway, Sunday night that dream came true!! My friend Joe got a new Nikon with a backdrop and flash equipment. He wanted to mess around and I wanted to be a pinup. Perfect! We rallied the team together - hair, makeup, director and had a blast!

The prep work was super exciting! Karen made me look so fatastically 1950s pinup. I wish I could do my makeup like that everyday!! Lol. Brit also made my hair gorgeously curly, which is something i always want. I picked out my outfits from the clothes I have which are mostly red. Everyone helped with accessories.

Then we started the shoot with test shots. A ton of them to figure out the flash. All the while I grew more and more nervous! I knew poses and faces but I don't think I was making the right ones!!

Once we started though, I relaxed and started to have fun. We were laughing and enjoying our amateur ways.Tyra would be disappointed...i need to learn to smile with my eyes!
Fantastic for a first photo shoot nevertheless!
 enjoy! =]

Lovelyish Link

So very WQ...i love lovelyish...

Post in progress, will be up shortly =]

Future Goals

I've been thinking about the Magazine a lot lately instead of this blog. This might be a big part as to why I haven't been posting consistent entries even though they've been bouncing around in my head. I really need to use my tape recorder. I've also been very tired, as I've mentioned before. My classes are more challenging this semester and it's crucial I do the readings. Therefore, I spend a lot of my time reading or procrastinating reading by staring mindlessly at Facebook or going out with friends. I've been working between 20 & 30 hours a week too. If I get a 2nd job my productivity will probably increase. The verdict is still out on if I'll sleep more. I literally fail at sleeping, life's basic necessity!!

On the brightside, I really think my classes are what's helping me fine tune what I want out of the Magazine. I want to create the ideas for it and live and breathe it. I want to be the ultimate warrior queen. A good example.

Some people have been asking a lot about the purpose of my blog or the Magazine. Here it is:

To Be a Positive Influence on Life

I want the Magazine to join women together in a world where positive self-image is the norm. I want women to follow their dreams and not think they have to abandon them just because they have children. You can have both! You can have fun! You can have anything you put your mind and your actions toward!

"You can't change the world, but you can make a dent," - Sheldon Mopes

I've also been realizing through Psychology of Women that I don't want this just to b e women based. Yet I am one and fall victim to the ease of bonding together as a gender instead of as a human race. Men are not bad. I love them. there it is again, though. "Them" as in us vs them. It's not. We are the human race. Together we can achieve it. Not separately.

Unfortunately, because of the name, the Magazine will probably mostly cater toward women. Maybe I will create a brand for men but I do not think it would last in the competitive world of magazines. There is a void and a need for this among the teen girl category, but most teen boys would not be willing to pick up a magazine like this.

Males are socially bred to show more confidence and it is often not socially acceptable to seek help or self help or to better oneself. Society tells us so. Women can seek help because we are the weaker sex. Clearly, we need the help. Personally, i think that everyone should seek to better oneselves.

My psychology of women class literally pointed out that women magazines focus more on fashion and relationships than confidence and positive living. I have also fallen victim to writing more about love and relationships than career, the world, or health. I know this is because I write of what I'm experiencing. Please don't mistake that the Magazine will be full of relationship stuff. There will be a section, yes, but there will be a majority of other positive things. There will be other contributors, which I have tried for the blog but failed.

Also, importantly to me, I want to stop saying "I hate boys they do this blah blah blah." Instead I want to say "I hate dealing with this drama...I hate when people do this." Because, Its not boys, it's people. We are a lot more similar than people really feel comfortable acknowledging. Take me for example. I took the BEM  test (which is a test using characteristics that society says are "male" or female" to determine a gender). IT turns out i'm androgynous. I scored 100 in female and 99 in male. Which makes sense if you know me.

So I'm not really sure where this all is heading, still. But I like where it's going. I like where I'm going. I'm fine tuning all of my WQ qualities. Being positive. Being happy. It's what I want for everyone <3

News 2/17

I know I neglected the last few days. I've been tired, my usual excuse. Facebook is the real culprit probably.
All of my news are political today, and i HAVE been reading the news everyday, just not posting them. Proud of myself =]
Also, I'm in the process of writing a blog about what I want my magazine to focus on with my psych of women class to back it up.

Obama Says Stimulus Bill Saved Troubled Economy
FED: Unemployment will remain high in the next 2 years

Valentine's Day

Valentine's Day. Oh, what a day.

You would think that since I'm newly single in a situation where I still have strong feelings for my ex would make today absolutely horrific. I know plenty of people had a horrible day.

I suppose the reason it didn't affect me very much is that this is just another day for me. It's a holiday I love and adore but I've never put the focus on it that so many people do. Valentine's Day is about love. I've always had a lot of that to give.

Committed Commitment Phobe

Commitment.

One word, can send a shiver up many people's spines. It's sent several up mine. Hard to believe since I've just gotten myself out of about 3 years of 2 relationships, both lasting more or less the same amount of time.

But if you know me, you know that I like to run...and fast!!

I don't know if it's the fact that I'm a Gemini and I'm extremely flighty or hard to hold onto...I never stick to one thing for long and I get so tired of people so easily. Don't get me wrong! I love my friends and I love to see them all the time but I need to be constantly stimulated and what stimulates me always changes.

It's just in my nature. Obviously, I found someone who was able to hold my attention for a long time. But Sasha's theory is because of the give and take of both relationships. With Hunter, I lived in Ohio when I actually wanted to be with him (fear of commitment red flag!), and we fought all the time. The roller coaster made me want to stay and fight.

To a more extreme degree, the Trevor roller coaster made me want to fight tooth and nail and survive and move in with him and do all kinds of things that people who are afraid of commitment don't want to do. I think, at one point, I was over my fear. Before the roller coaster began back in April. I think that I really was ready to date someone seriously and see them on a regular basis and not freak out. Then again, this is just speculation. Definitely though, what's held me for the last several months, in addition to my love for him, because that's not something I'm doubting, is the attraction he's added to himself by being unavailable and then not.

((Maybe I'm like a guy??))

My dating history is not very strong at all.

1. Jeremy: 3 days.

2. Joey: does this even count?! We lived 50 miles apart and were 13.
3. Theiler: 5 months. I saw him 2 times outside of school...We broke up because I put my friends first...

4. Jared: 2 weeks. He was too clingy.

5. Kyle: 1 week. I wasn't a practicing Christian?

6. Trevor: 5 months. He lived far away, I saw him ONCE.

7. Hunter: 1 year 3 months. We fought and broke up a lot for the first 6 months because I didn't want to be in a relationship. The ensuing 9 months consisted of lots of fighting and me fighting FOR him because I wanted stability or might have loved him in a crazy way?

8. Trevor: officially? Who knows. altogether it was 1.5 year ordeal.

So as you can see, I'm pretty flighty or crazy or something. I suppose I'm still trying to figure this whole thing out. I'm scared that I'm going to be terrified of dating and run away from everyone like I've done to all of the guys in between all of these ones who were able to snag me, at least for just a small amount of time.

I'm not high maintenance, I'm just a lot to handle...

P.S. I don’t wanna get inside your mind or your pants

I don’t wanna waste my time with love and romance
I want my next-ex-girlfriend, my next-ex-girlfriend
I don’t want the fairy tale and
I don’t want the girl from hell
Don't wanna be your biggest mistake
You can be my next-ex-girlfriend, my next-ex-girlfriend

-Bowling For Soup, "Next Ex-Girlfriend"

News 2/13

So I've been diligent on the news articles, but not the posting of the wq blogs! I'm sorry! I know it's building up (the excitement) but I'm just exhausted right now or I don't have enough time to write a full wq blog!!

Tomorrow is VDAY though. It warrents a post at least. So I'll do one tomorrow. =]

Sinatra Song Often Strikes a Deadly Chord

Dad sent me this yesterday because he knew I was going to go to karaoke last night. SUPER interesting article, kind of funny because you just think to yourself...REALLY?! that really happened? Oh yes, yes it did.

More than just facebook friended

Oh facebook, what do you to do people?

Saudi Officials Put the Squeeze on Valentine's Day

WOW. That's kinda funny. But why is there always such an emphasis on this holiday? It's just another day. A lot of fun though =]

News 2/12

I keep being too tired to actually type in a warrior queen blog. I apologize. It's coming though, I can promise that. It's about being scared of commitment...there's also one in the works about Global Warming, Moving On, etc etc. But for now, here are my news stories!

Author, 17, says it's mixing, not plaigerism

As a college student and just a person of the same generation, I can understand her frustration about being told she's plaigerising. It IS difficult to find things that have not been said before, especially in research papers, etc...but Sourcing...that's the whole key. I also don't think it's too hard to REPHRASE ideas into your own way...this coming from the journalist who must battle several other papers, etc for a story...

Wi-Fi turns rowdy bus into rolling study hall

I'm not sure if they are doing homework online...in regards to the headline. However, this is an interesting idea. Although, like always...only those who are wealthy enough to have a laptop could use it...

Global Warming and Weather Psychology

I'm always intrigued by global warming and psychology so naturally I was pulled in by this headline. It's OPINION. I want to make sure everyone knows this. It's a series of blogs by different journalists on this issue...enjoy!

I'm going to go and bake some Valentine's goodies with a friend before work and karaoke tonight. Let's hope I'm not too tired to finally post my warrior queen blogs !!

My Top News

It's Time for the News Articles!!

I know, it's taken me all day, but I wasn't able to really get on this morning because I had to figure out the bus schedule to work! Then I got off and took a friend some cupcakes to cheer him up and then had class!! So here we go.

Iran Crackdown Quashes Protests

On Tuesday in my psychology of women class we had a Persian guest speaker who told us about her struggles during the Persian revolution in the 1970s. There's a lot going on with Iran right now. They shut off the internet in the country to stop transmissions (or something along those lines) My friend's friend helped by using his IP address today. I'm not quite sure how that works, but interesting nonetheless. What I find most interesting is how liberated Iran used to be and how rigid it now is. In this day and age, that seems peculiar.

Move to Merge Asperger's, autism in diagnostic manual stirs debate

I'm not sure if most people are aware but Asperger's and autism absolutely fascinates me. It might be because it's my mom's specialty at work, or because I've worked with my kids who are autistic...but there's a new debate on it and that's very intriguing!!

British Designer Alexander McQueen Found Dead

I'm not particularly into fashion. Obviously, clothing interests me and I love shopping but high fashion and fashion shows are not usually things that I pay attention to. I watched Top Designer and America's Next Top Model because it was on 24/7 at my friend's house // my dorm, not because I actively wanted to watch it. Still, Alexander McQueen's an interesting fellow. RIP.

I have to run off to catch the bus for work,

but I will be posting my top 3 news stories when I get off of work,

especially considering today is the big Iranian protest!!!

Have a great day!

Lot's of blogs tonight =]

News for the Day

Okay, this is something new I want to start out. I hope I stick to it.

I'm taking American Studies and Psychology of Women and Psychology of Adult Development and Chemistry. For some reason all of these classes are making me want to be up to date on the news.

I FAIL at reading the news. Hardcore fail. I'm a journalist, I should live and breathe the news. But I don't. So, I'm going to try and post my top news articles every morning in hopes that I will start reading headlines at least more. I need to be more informed like when I was in high school!!

So Here it GOES!

Whole Genome of Ancient Human Discovered

--I'd just like to point out the term huMAN. (I'm supposed to be looking for adrogyny terms for my psych of women class)

Google plans to offer broadband service

--Google along with Facebook are taking over the world. I'm not sure if I protest

Brenanke says Federal Reserve will scale back stimulus policies...eventually

--Gotta love the economic and bank climate right now...

Enjoy,

P.s. I just wanted to point out this is my 101st post...I am so glad my 100th post was so mind-blowingly good!

P.P.S. I'm working on tonight / tomorrow's blog, don't worry!!

Let Go

As the saying goes, when you love someone, you let them go. Or do you let them go because you don't love them? What is love?

It's something I believe in and yet I cannot define it. It's chemical, magical, a feeling, I just don't know. It's weird how someone can physically have such an affect on another person. Some might say what I'm describing is infatuation or lust. But it goes so much deeper than that when you've known the person for years and been best friends.

I want to be in control. Love is the only thing I have surrendered myself to. It's apparent in how I've acted and what I've been willing to sacrifice.

Love conquers all.

All's fair in love and war.

The two have never been more similar.

I suppose I can never know if we truly loved or love each other, but I believe we have. Things get in the way of love. Unfortunately. Life happens. It's all that we've got.

Letting go doesn't mean I've stopped loving. I just had to decide I love me more. People everywhere have to make this unfortunate decision. I'm not giving up on anything. If things are going to work out decisions will lead us back to it.

I have found, however, that I let go awhile ago of the true heart of things. This is slightly disconcerting but also good for my grieving process I suppose. I can't pinpoint the exact moment. The seed of doubt snuck in back in April. It's slowly began unraveling everything ever since. It made these moments easy.

It does hurt though. It hurts like when I've let go of friendships or if I think about restructuring my future and of losing friends. But, that's how life is. There's always restructuring going on.

I get through everyday happy, smiling and having a blast. There are moments when my heart will pound when I think of things. But they're that, fleeting moments.

Nothing and no one has ever consumed me, even though it may have appeared that way from time to time with different people. I knew this would happen, but I needed to try again. I wanted to believe in love.

Ari put it perfectly, "We don't let go because they do care. But the thing is, Rae, someone else will care too."

So do I believe that I only have one person to love? I'm not sure. Really, I feel like you love everyone in a different manner in a different way, so how am I to know?

I'm not closing my heart to love from anyone.

WQ

p.s. http://www.datingish.com/721578587/musings-on-love/

Feminism

Okay, to start off. I apologize for the unintenional hiatus. School started and I temporarily lost my mind on top of it. I've been meaning to write this blog since last Tuesday after the class I had sparked this idea. But, such is life. Craziness!

Laate last Tuesday night I posted asking for opinions on Feminism. [[I'm pretty sure only Courtney reads my blog because only she responded but that's okay. haha.]] What she said is exactly what I wanted to talk about!!

Feminism. Most people view it as this ugly thing. I'm a feminist. You probably could tell that I'm all about girls all the time, but I bet no one really thought I described myself as a feminist. But I am.

I asked my mom this question the other day and she said she's not a feminist, she just believes that women should support and love each other and have rights. Hmmm...if that's not feminism, then what is?

Let's break it down with an actual definition, courtesy of Merriam Webster:

Main Entry: fem·i·nism

Pronunciation: \ˈfe-mə-ˌni-zəm\

Function: noun

Date: 1895

1 : the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes
2 : organized activity on behalf of women's rights and interests

Now, let's pull the definition from my textbook (Btw I'm taking Psychology of Women. It's going to be so good!)

Feminism: The idea that women's experiences and ideas are valued.

NOW. Save for what I'm pretty sure is just a very LOUD minority, most people believe that women's experiences and ideas are valued. The idea of feminism is not antagonistic toward men. I mean, I love men! Not just romantically, either. There are some very very amazing guy friends out there.

I suppose I fall under the category that every person should be valued. So yes, I'm all about girls making a name for themselves and being whoever they want to be. I want to be a mom, more than probably having my magazine. I want to cook dinner for my future husband, I don't mind cleaning the house. OH MY GOD, how could I go against my feminist ideas?

But I'm not. I'm just expressing the different facets of things that I desire in life.

For the record...there are 3 different types of approaches to feminism (just to educate ya)

1. Liberal feminism (me): someone who wants to reduce gender roles by passing laws that guarantee equal rights for women and men. "Liberal feminists emphasize that gender differences are relatively small; these differences would be even smaller if women had the same opportunities as men"

2. Cultural feminism: there are a certain numbers of positive qualities that are stronger in women, such as nurturing. [[i really find this not true with some women]]. This focuses on gender differences that value women and they often argue that society should be restructured to emphasize cooperation rather than aggression.

3. Radical feminism: the basic cause of woemn's oppression lies deep in the entire sex and gender system rather than in superficial laws and policies. Sexism permeates our society and our society needs to drastically changed.

Out of these three, the "bra burners" are radicals. Clearly. Also though, the bra burnings never happened.

The media (you gotta love the media, even as I strive to work FOR it) has this awesome ability to construe everything that could be good, as bad. Therefore, feminism is bad! Don't like it! Don't be a feminist! We'll take over the world and kill all men and men are horrible horrible creatures.

NO! Enough.

Let's all just be people. Support each other. No more girl cruelty and mind games.

Be. Love.

p.s. book reference: The Psychology of Women by Margaret W. Matlin

p.p.s. check out this too!

Q&A

Hi. I'm just wondering, what your definition of feminism is? Or rather, when you hear the word feminism what is your first thought?

Answer both?

I want to write a blog about it, but I wanna know opinions first.

kthanksbyeee