Outrageous

I used to be outrageous.

I'm talking the girl with the pink hair and nose ring who said the most ridiculous thing. I'm talking about the girl who used to openly put on her Myspace that she was cocky [because who says only boys can be cocky?] I'm talking about the girl who said if you've got it flaunt it...the girl who had rumors about her at school, but laughed in their faces...the girl who would go camping every weekend she could and ride a quad without a care in the world...the girl who had her running shoes on because she definitely did not want a man to tie her down...the girl who had a boyfriend because she was bored, not because she needed love because she loved herself more than she thought any boy ever could...

Seriously, I used to be outrageous.

Look at this stuff:

Those pants. OH THOSE PANTS. They are mentioned in my wedding website actually

Just fixing quads by myself NBD

Who is a dark angel? Apparently I was

Dirty. And ripped jeans...

The girl who made her going away dinner a lingerie party at 18...

The girl who did sexy photoshoots alone in her room

This [more or less] was my Myspace about me...and still is my FB one, actually. oooops. 

I'm not going to lie, I'm completely insane.

☮ ♥ :)

California owns my heart but i will always bleed Scarlet and Gray ♥

I’m mainstream (but i like it).

A cocky bitch. (and you love it.)

Kid at heart. (Let's Play!)

Procrastinator. (but I get my shit done)

Journalist. (Life calling)

Ambitious. (You can't stop me)

Pin Up Girl. (Drop Dead Gorgeous)

Crazy Girl. (I wouldn't have it any other way)

Dream Girl. (You want me)

Warrior Queen. (Lifestyles)

I like boy things. (But i'm such a girl)

OCD. ADD. GAD. Panic Disorder. 

You Know You Love Me

I don't understand why people like me...but I'm okay with that =] 

I like to say really morbid things in happy tones. I'm weird.

I was outrageous. I like to think I still am secretly. On the inside. With a deep dark secret. I portray myself as all sweet and innocent, like I always have, and then I drop an f bomb...or five. Then I say things like "You can't get pregnant by taking off your shirt!!" and everyone just takes it as normal.

I'm still sometimes outrageous. Like the fact that I take pole dancing classes and it makes me feel outrageous all over again. I don't want to be an old lady grandma that's conservative! I want to be the crazy, cool one with blue hair.

I need to get my outrageousness back.

But being a grown up sucks that away from me. I have to do things like pay for bills and sleep at a reasonable hour. I have to have normal hair colors, no facial piercings and sometimes hide my tattoos. I have to wear clothes that don't look like a little kid put them together...even though sometimes I still really like to play dress up.

I mean, I'm writing Christmas cards this holiday season. That has to be the complete opposite of outrageous!

I think this post rambles but, that's the more outrageous Raewyn coming out to play...

Any advice to make my day-to-day life a little outrageous all over again?





p.s. I used to be so outspoken and political, too. Now I'm all about peace. Maybe that's why my outrageousness went away. I can't be a firecracker every day.

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