Friendships: Growing Up and Growing Apart

I'm almost twenty-five; and in June, i will have been out of high school for seven years. It doesn't seem to matter how long ago you graduated, though, high school-like drama always seems to find you. Sometimes friendships grow apart, as we grow up but we don't realize the friendship has come to an end until it is filled with toxic drama. Friendship drama is the worst. I am sure we all have it as we grow apart. 
The worst part about growing up and growing apart is knowing when it's time to call it quits.
I've had a few friendships end too late, and others that I thought ended too soon. With another person involved in the friendship, it is easy to feel slighted. 

After high school and college it is harder to keep in contact with friends. We spend 40+ hours a week working, hours in traffic (for commuters like me) and it's easy to come home and just be exhausted. 
When we're in high school, our different interests make our friendships worthwhile. As we grow and get into different careers, we start to have less in common. 
That is when friendships start to fade. It takes a lot more work to stay in contact with someone whose day to day life is different than yours. It doesn't mean that those friendships have to end, just that they take more work. 
Both of you must work harder to keep your friendship strong. It is a careful balance. 
I have had many friendships where I've felt like I've given more and ended up getting slighted; and I've had friendships where I've given my all and I realize now, that it was still not enough. Holding grudges only makes the drama worse.
As we grow apart, letting go earlier is easier. 
Some times, a solution to growing apart is having a true heart-to-heart about your current lives. If you feel like your friend never texts you back, maybe it is because she actually doesn't like texting (or have time) and would prefer a phone call from now on. 
The important part in growing apart and avoiding drama, is to always be graceful in your conversations. A friend may be lashing out at you and your friendship. Don't snap back or ignore his/her feelings. Try to be understanding.

At the same time, it is important to realize when it's over. Sometimes those words "I am sorry, I just don't think we are very good friends anymore." 
Hopefully, your friend feels it, too, or can help you find a way to stop your friendship from growing apart. 
Or there's the drama approach with the response being along the lines of "Fine then don't be my friend" or "You really seem to care so much about me to end the friendship."
Unfortunately, then you are left with a dilemma. Do you enter into the drama or do you just let it be? 
My response? Let it be! 

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Wedding Wednesday: A Flashback

Good morning!!

I am super excited to do a Wedding Wednesday post because it's been almost two weeks since my last one!! WHAT! I'm also writing a guest post over on Army Ever After tomorrow that is wedding related, and another one yesterday on DIY Bride that is wedding related...so we're getting a little wedding crazy!

Which makes me happy. First of all, our Save the Dates were all received and I met with my maid of honor to map out all of the rest of the important dates. Next I'm working on the wedsite and some small stuff, like going to see the venue with Liz on the 17th!

Today I wanted to give you guys a little flashback..into the very fist time Iman and I did anything romantic...I made the first move.

Feb 3, 2007

I'm not big on dancing and in high school I rarely went to any school dances. Actually, I went to Homecoming my freshman year and Winter Formal my senior year. That's it, no prom for me!

I knew I wanted to go to one dance my senior year and when they announced the theme for Winter Formal, my best friend and I melted. We HAD to  go. The problem [or maybe it was a good thing] with Winter Formal is that it is Sadie Hawkins at our high school! Hello, nerves!

I didn't like anyone, really. Well, that's a lie. I liked Iman. I always liked Iman. He was in the middle of one of his mixed signal times. As in his Myspace said he had a girlfriend and some crazy chick was all over it, but he was taking me to the movies and holding my hand...But I digress.

I was determined to ask him, hopeful that something would come out of it. Since I never knew when I was going to see the kid though I sent him some vague text message, or maybe the text message made sense and he was just being a butthead in reply. [Side note, I don't think I was allowed to text...but I did anyway].

My dress is from Aardvark's on Melrose. My mom bought it in the 80s, it's from the 50s!!

I think I asked him all cutesy. He replied with "Miss Smith, are you asking me to Winter Formal?" Duh.

So then I had to find THE dress. I don't think I had ever been as excited about something like this. I'm a tom boy. I let everyone else do most of the planning. Soon it was the day...February 3, 2007. Iman, of course, tried to play it like he had no idea what was going on that day when I called him.

"Are you almost here?"
"Almost where?"
"My house, for Winter Formal?"
"AH! I thought it was next week!"

Little shit was outside my house the whole time!!

My best friends!! [note my worried face because I couldn't find Iman...]

 So we took pictures, which I remember was awkward because we weren't a couple but we always acted like a couple and all of these parents kept asking us how long we'd been dating.

Just look at that smile! Who wouldn't love it?

Then we went to dinner and that was fun...

He hates this picture because he was being weird...

Then it was time to dance! Which I did a lot of, on account that Iman LOVES to dance. I couldn't help it, he was so cute. He'd be all modern dancing one second and swishing my skirt the next.

He ws so sweet too, my vintage 1950s dress broke in the middle of the dance and he pulled a safety pin out of his pocket and fixed it...

After the dance :)

Then after the dance, as I was saying goodbye to him at his car...I remember I was sitting in his trunk talking to him. Everyone else had already gone inside. I wanted him to kiss me SO bad.

As I began to fall into the trunk [Literally saying the words "I'm fall-"] he kissed me.

Fireworks. There were fireworks. 

I didn't know what else to do so I finished my sentence. Then that amazing man kissed me one more time, got in his car and left me there to gush to my friends....




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