Monday, March 29, 2010

Running Away

I just got back from watching The Runaways. It opened in select theaters and opens everywhere on April 9th. The storyline follows the book written by Cherie Currie, former lead singer of the band The Runaways. It chronicles the band's rise to fame and her own downfall coupled with Joan Jett's imminent success.

It was pretty fuckin awesome. Those girls are warrior queens, even though they dabbled in things that I, personally would hope most warrior queens don't do (hard drugs). It was a different time, but Joan fought for her dream. I must admit, I'm a little disappointed in my father for not inundating me with their awesome music at a young age, leaving me able to only recall some of Joan Jett's songs and none of the Runaways (although, I have seen Joan Jett and the Blackhearts live in concert <3)

As far as the acting went in this flick...Kristin Stewart BLEW ME AWAY. I don't generally think of her as a great actress. I suppose she is though, and has just played crappy parts. (Let's face it, Bella has a very flat personality, Kristin Stewart had NOTHING to work with.) She had the stance down, the attitude, the name it, she seemed to fit the part perfectly. Dakota Fanning was nothing short of amazing, as always. She really is one of my favorite actresses, and I'm very happy to see her getting roles as she's aged and matured, instead of just being a child star.


On a completely and totally different note...I found this article when I was logging onto MSN just a few minutes ago and really felt the need to share it, but not the need to divide it into another post so, I'm just going to join these two together. I'll link to the article, but here's my overview of this.

This girl from Yemen, who is now 12 years old, has just had a memoir published in her name in America. I need to get it and read it. The story follows her marriage at the age of 9, and divorce at 10. She is such a warrior queen!! There are definitely problems in our world (particularly in the Third World) where poverty surmounts to child brides. This young girl had the courage to run away, hail a taxi, and with the help of a human right's lawyer, appeal and get the first divorce among child brides in her country. She is such an inspiration!!  [[Although, I can't help but think how messed up her adolescents is going to be, since I've started to study adolescents and emerging adulthood in one of my psych classes. I'm beginning to realize just how much your past does affect who you are today.]]

Anyway, enough of my random postings for tonight. I am still working on that other blog, but I needed to throw this up tonight before I forgot about it! Sleep well,

Sunday, March 28, 2010

This weekend, Datingish has been awesomely filled with some amazing posts, so I'm quoting another one. I DO have a blog that I myself am writing. But sometimes people say it better than I do (which is why I want a magazine) Enjoy!

Keep It Moving and Expect Nothing


I am slowly learning that some things that happen in my dating life are simply not worth analyzing. For example, nothing burns me up more than a guy not calling when he says he will. When this happens, I do not simply think that he forgot or got too busy. I put on my “Ms. Smart Girl” hat and think:
·  He’s testing the boundaries of the relationship to see how often he can not follow through on what he says he will do.
·  He feels himself getting too close to me. He’s trying to pull away and establish his independence.
And then I finally get around to:
· He’s just not that into me.
Now, I firmly believe in the truth of the book (and now movie) He’s Just Not That Into You. However, I often am not satisfied with simply telling myself the awful truth. Rather, I want to do a deep analysis of exactly what went wrong, when things began to unravel, and what I can do differently next time. While completing a multi-level analysis of why a guy and I don’t seem to be “meshing” might make me feel accomplished and in control, it does not make me any happier than I was before I launched into my intellectual exercise.
You conjecturing about why someone is not acting the way you want them to does not make them change their behavior. It just wastes your time, imagination, and saps your happiness and peace of mind.
Therefore, when you are dating a guy and he does something you do not like, appreciate, or understand, keep it moving. 
By “keep it moving,” I mean go about your life, doing whatever you were doing before you met Mr. Flaky and don’t worry about why he is acting up. He could have forgotten, he could be busy, he might be testing your boundaries, asserting his independence, or he could just not be into you. The key for you to understand is that the best thing you can do for yourself—and for the relationship—is to keep it moving. Do not bog yourself down with worrying about it or even with “setting him straight”. As Sherry Argov, author of Why Men Love Bitches, says, “Men do not respond to words. They respond to no contact.”
Keeping it moving is not about playing games or being passive aggressive. It’s about taking a step back, relaxing, and focusing on doing what makes you happy—rather than focusing on understanding the cause and origin of something that is making you unhappy. If you really want Mr. Maybe Right to stop making last minute plans with you, don’t go out with him when he tries to make these last minute plans with you. If you want him to call you when he says he will, do not text him with subtle reminders like, “Hope you’re having a great day!” (Guys see right through that by the way). Just keep it moving, have your own great day, and if he calls, great. If not, you haven’t wasted time and energy on worrying about it. It’s all about encouraging goal-congruent dating behavior.
Expect Nothing
An important part of keeping it moving is to expect nothing. As an optimistic person with high expectations for myself and others, this has been a hard pill to swallow. But I have finally swallowed it, and I hope the time-release capsule works well enough to constantly remind me to expect nothing from guys I am casually dating. This is not me giving you permission to let people treat you badly.
It is about not putting expectations on people who do not have the title associated with such expectations.
For example, if a guy is not your boyfriend, do not expect him to do boyfriend things like buy you gifts, move you out of your apartment, or go shopping with you. If he does these things, this is a wonderful thing. He is doing these things because he wants to be your boyfriend someday, and is showing you how great of a boyfriend he would be. However, expecting someone you are casually dating to do these things will likely lead to disappointment and frustration on your part and confusion and distancing on his part. Now, the “expect nothing” mantra actually extends to some pretty everyday things like:
· When he says, “let’s get together some time,” do not expect him to take you out. It might happen; it might not.
· When he says, “I’ll call you later,” this does not mean “I am now setting an alarm for exactly six hours from now after which I will dutifully call you and talk about your day with you.” It means, “I might call. I might not—depending on how I feel.”
When men and women have these misunderstandings, it is not because either party is doing something wrong. As John Gray says in Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, Men and women speak different languages even when we are using the same words.
By expecting nothing, you are better able to keep yourself from a) putting unrealistic expectations on guys who are not your boyfriend, b) getting upset when people don’t meet these expectations, and c) keep it moving. If you didn’t expect him to actually call later, you won’t be stressed out when the call does not come.
Now, “keep it moving” and “expect nothing” have to go together. If you simply keep it moving but continue to have boyfriend expectations for men you are casually dating, you will end up bouncing from one not-your-boyfriend guy to the next, continually feeling let down. If you expect nothing but you don’t keep it moving, you will end up accepting crumbs from guys you are dating. You’ll stick around with guys that you expect nothing from—and you will get just that—nothing.
Keep It Moving and Expect Nothing must go together. When casually dating, you do not have high expectations for the guys. Let them show you how much they care rather than you decide how much they should care. And if they do things you don’t like, understand, or appreciate, keep it moving. I don’t mean break up with them, refuse to see them, or lecture them about what they did wrong. Just do your homework, go out to dinner with your friends, go to the gym, use those acrylic paints you bought, or go on a date with someone else. Do not spend time being upset or worried about what is going on.
I’m still learning how to expect nothing and keep it moving, but I get better at it every day. So far, it’s been better for everyone involved in my dating life. The guys don’t have me lecturing them about how “I’m a catch, and I deserve to be treated with respect,” my friends don’t have to listen to “Why doesn’t he just do what he says he’s going to do?!” and I have more time and energy to study for my finals, hang out with my friends, and of course, date the guys who are most interested in me.
Ending Note: To those of you who may be confused, this post was written before Mr. C and I were boyfriend and girlfriend. So no worries! We are together and fine.
How do you keep it moving? How have your expectations affected your dating life?

I found this interesting...

Emotions Are Not Entirely Illogical


Many people talk about emotion and logic in a manner that suggests the two don’t match up, as if they are always distinct and separate. They assert that emotion has no basis in logic, and logic has no basis in emotion. While one could make the argument that the latter is true (does physics have a foundation of emotion?), I propose that the former is never true. No, I do not believe that ideas of pure logic match up with ideas that incorporate emotion, but the reasons behind the emotion are always logical.

I recently came across a Datingish post entitled “Are You Overthinking on Love?” (you can read ithere). The author of this post claims that “Ones who have been in love know that love defies all logic. We see an imperfect person oh so perfectly. We fall head over heels for someone who may not even have the slightest interest. We can’t seem to find the reason we’re in love with him/her…” This raises a valid point: One doesn’t always know why they’re in love. However, that doesn’t mean that there isn’t a logical reason behind it, it simply means that that logic is hidden in the subconscious. People can ‘fall in love’ for a plethora of reasons, ranging from positive traits that person has, the way that person makes us feel, or even that we long for what we can’t have, among others. Perhaps the person he or she is ‘in love with’ does cause him or her emotional harm, but there’s something about them specifically that attracts the other person specifically. That comes down to personalities, and personalities are largely emotion-driven.

Furthermore, just because one knows why the way they feel is ‘wrong,’ the reasoning behind their feeling is still potentially logical. For instance, in a couple where one person is much more sexually experienced than the other, the less experienced person may not be entirely at ease with the imbalance. He or she may feel that, because the other person has had the same relations with many other people, it devalues the relations they are having together; on the other hand, because the less experienced person has had no people prior to their current SO, he or she may feel he or she places more importance on the sexual interactions. Is this entirely illogical? No. Because it makes perfect sense that when something happens less often, the times when it does happen seem more substantial. When applied to the scenario, this perceived difference in importance can stretch to feelings on the entirety of the relationship, and it can then manifest as jealousy. The reason that this is not a purely “logical” thought process is because it may ignore key things, such as the fact that the past acts were the results of relationships that are not entirely comparable, and relationships that, even if emotion did factor into them, don’t directly apply to the current state. Even so, the emotions are driven by logical thought processes, despite the fact that the logic may be contained to the individual’s understanding of the situation.

Don’t get me wrong: Logic and emotion are distinct in several key ways. Logic on its own isn’t necessarily going to alter emotional perceptions, and emotion doesn’t stand a chance of making something that was once entirely logical invalid unless one is making the point to involve emotional concerns in the logic. The fact of the matter is that human beings are not strictly emotional, nor are they strictly logical. Because our brains control the entirety of our body, everything is interconnected. We cannot think entirely logically, objectively, because every single one of us is in some way biased. The only thing we can do to undermine this bias is consider as many aspects as possible… but the bias still exists in nearly everything, and definitely in psychological questions. In short, anything that involves emotion cannot be looked at from a purely logical perspective (because to ignore emotions when they are a major factor is illogical), and emotions are founded on thought processes that make some logical sense, even if it’s hidden in the subconscious.

The practical difference, I think, in logic and emotions is how the thought process affects the chemicals in the brain. Emotions, after all, are merely the release of chemicals in the brain that make us feel happy or sad, raise heart rate, dilate our eyes, make us sweat, and make us shiver, among other things. Emotions may be thought to be the reactions to certain thoughts that wouldn’t necessarily happen if the thoughts were not as relevant to their interests.

If one acts on 'emotion' over 'logic', that means that person is going after what he or she wants over what he or she knows would be the 'best' in terms of avoiding pain or gaining pleasure for him/her or other people, but the reason the person wants it makes logical sense to begin with.

What are your thoughts on this blog? I found it on Datingish. If you really want to get your mind blown by this, check out the comments on the original post. =]

Thursday, March 25, 2010

Girl Cruelty and Jealousy

One thing that I really don't think I could ever understand is truly having negative feelings for someone I've never met and then trying to do something to ruin her life. I'm talking about hatred, mixed with a large dose of the green-eyed monster.

What is the appeal? It's a waste of time. It's a waste of emotion that breeds more negativity  and ill-will and you can literally make yourself sick with that stuff.

Why bother?

Nine times out of ten I can guarantee the ill-wisher is hurt more than their victim. Take the Venezuela Canoe story, for example.

This girl was very jealous of my friend because the guy she liked was hanging out with my friend a lot. They were not dating, my friend had a boyfriend. This girl ended up calling and leaving my friend a loong message. The best part of the message was "Why don't you just get back in your canoe and row back to Venezeula and BE A SLAVE"

Now, of course I quoted the funniest part. But this girl thought that that would really insult my friend. The moral? My friend laughs over this for months AFTER. I even got to listen to it and laugh - and I met her over a year after it happened.

Of course this jealousy always seems to be over a guy. It's easy to take the one thing that can make someone the most insecure (love) and twist it into bad things. It's not worth it.

Shouldn't you be happy with yourself without it?

Oh I know it's tempting, believe me. I've had my fair share of girl cruelty moments egged on by my insecurities. Luckily I have amazing support who remind me that I'm better than that. Which I am.

But what I'm not above is making the public declaration that it seems these acts are always d one against the strongest girls, emotionally. The girls who are happy, don't show insecurity and who love almost everyone.

((I assure you, we have insecurities too, don't be envious of us))

The dream girls. The warrior queens. Don't let their mean words, thoughts, and actions break you. We have something far more for ourselves.

Monday, March 22, 2010

WQ Recognition

Rosa Parks was an ultimate warrior queen. All the way down to the definition. She gracefully fought segregation. She refused to be treated in a manner less than she deserved. She was a queen. She inspires me.

Not only did she refuse to get up (please note, she sat IN the colored section NOT next to a white person). She accpeted her punishment for breaking the law with grace. She didn't fight it then and there. She waited, then went on to fight the injustices and claim her civil liberties taht were promised to her by the Constitution.

She did not partake in hatred for whites, nor in any hate crimes or illegal activities. She spoke of love and nurtured the minds of teens to believe the truth that they can be what they want. She merely taught them what was supposedly her inalienable rights. They organized a Bus Boycott. Also, something that was not illegal, but alltogether aggravating to the whites in the South.

I admire her. In American Studies last week we beganwatching a video on civil liberties, Rosa Parks and MLK. I'm so empathetic. I got all teary eyed because I was proud of her for being a warrior queen. Before they were even called that. She's an inpsiration, a role model.

Who else is a good historical WQ and role model?

Thursday, March 18, 2010

I have a lot of blogs that are hand written, that I just haven't had time to type up! Sorry WQs!
I'll have them up just probably won't be until Sunday. Tonight I have classes and (maybe) a date and tomorrow I work a double, see molly, and leave for Glamis...Should be a good time for sure =]
Please be patient for a blog!!

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Big Changes, Big Problems

I like to use the phrase "Be the Change" when I talk about the type of life I try to lead. That coupled with "Move in Your Own Way" << The catchy tagline Thom added to the magazine logo...=] I'm wondering how many people know what I actually mean by this.

I'm a firm believer that nothing in life is static except for the fact that things will continuously be changing. I strive for stability but it is something I will never completely reach. There is always something interrupting everything else, but that's a good thing. That's life.

Looking around the world at problems globally, nationally, locally, and within my own relationships, I see that that there are a lot of changes that need to / should be changed so that things can be better. I'm always striving to better myself, to better everything.

The way I see it though, big changes aren't going to cut it. Big changes are hard to implement and harder to keep. Look at how hard it's been for Obama to make true his promise for "free" healthcare. Small changes are what we need. The grass-roots movements are always the most effectual.

"You can't change the world, but you can make a dent," - Smoochy

I feel like the same goes for relationships. Big changes are just going to backfire on you. It takes a small commitment everyday for things to work - an affirmation that you want things to work in a certain way.

[[ It's the little things that really get me too. A surprise or a note or a kiss means more to me than a big proclamation of love like the purchase of expensive jewelry or a trip somewhere. I like to appreciate these things! ]]

So before you go making promises up the wazoo that you're gonna make the biggest change, remember that there's always going to be opposition met and it's going to be hard. So try making the little changes first. <3

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

11 Things every woman should do

Lovelyish posted a really great article that's very WQ!!!

Learn self defense. The few hours you take to learn it can save your life. I've seen short women take down guys over 6 feet tall who underestimated them because of size. Size doesn't matter, it's where you hit. I recommend Just yell fire. You can download it FREE or request DVDs. It's less than an hour but it's very useful. Even though it's geared towards young girls, the lessons are useful for all women. Here's the link:
Get involved with politics. I couldn't care less what party you join but educate yourself & get involved. I've followed politics since I was a kid since we had to do current events projects a lot. In fact, the first political race I followed was Mario Cuomo going against George Pataki for NY Governor in 1994 when I was 8 for class. I'm glad because SO much affects women these days & so many aren't informed. When I mean politics, I mean every branch. From your City Manager to the President of the United States. What happens at the very bottom goes up to the top & you need to be kept informed. If you want to better things, get involved. I never heard of whining winning anything. Trust me, the people who bitch the most after elections about things are the ones who never voted.

Know your rights. There are many places & employers that try to intimidate women saying the job will think they're whining or they deny you privileges. I had one job where a guy hurt himself & they found him work to do with no trouble. I had a paper trail 2 months long, prescriptions as proof I couldn't work & they've SEEN me in the middle of asthma attacks, yet they tried to say I didn't qualify for medical leave. Once I went overhead with my letters, they were singing a new song.

Learn how to fix little things for yourself. It's not secret some businesses will charge women extra for some things because they think we don't know anything. I've seen my mother curse out huge, muscular mechanics or business owners for trying to cheat us out of money thinking we didn't know what issues we had. It was (and sometimes still is...) embarrassing as a kid but now that I'm older, I'm glad. Not saying you need to curse people out but it's good to keep on top of things. Even if you don't know how to fix it, we will know where to get it done without being cheated. And check Kelly Blue Book before reselling a car. People will try to underbuy. Changing your oil or tire isn't always easy, but shelling out $30 per service adds up over time. It also helps to do research before calling for services. If they try to up the charge for the same EXACT service, leave...then call the Better Business Bureau (BBB) or whatever business reporting agency your country has.

Break stereotypes. It only takes one to make someone think all women aren't bad. I've seen girls try to be "independent women" with backwards feminism & they make us all look bitchy. So if a guy holds a door for you or offers to help carry something, say thank you, even if you don't accept the help.

Do it yourself. Don't rely on anyone to help. I'm not meaning this as no one will ever help you, but it's not worth keeping your life on hold waiting for others. Learn to exist as one person. I hate when girls get so dependent on men/friends for money, affection or gifts that they can't function on their own & end up using men or others to get what they want/need. My mom told me from the beginning the only person you can trust 100% is yourself & you cant be dependent on people. I've had people my age laugh at me because I go to sit down places to eat by myself (what, I'm supposed to starve because I'm alone?), go shopping or the movies. Yeah it's fun with friends but if I have no one to go with, I'll go alone with no shame. For one thing, it's not good to be so clingy because that too alienates people.

Don't be scared of the GYN (aka: the girlie doctor). They're there to HELP you, not judge you. I've heard so many stupid stories about not going because it's embarrassing, they're "too young", it's uncomfortable, blah blah. It's ONCE a year, unless you're sick, high risk or pregnant. I don't like it either but I'd rather the few moments of discomfort than to not know then, God Forbid, there's a problem that could have been caught early. Trust me, I had to go for cyst issues but I'm so glad I went because even though they weren't cancerous, they HURT & affected my ability to work & function. I was lucky, those who choose not to go may not be. Age isn't a factor anymore. Jade Goody was 27 when she died from cervical cancer & it's making doctors screen even earlier.

Learn to drive. Even if you have someone with you 24/7 to take you wherever, or you live by the train/bus, you should learn because you never know when you may have to get behind the wheel. Plus, the longer you've been driving, the cheaper your insurance will be. New drivers are always pay a little extra because of the possibility of accidents. Pretty much until you're 25, you're a high risk but learn as soon as you can. It gets easier & you'll feel more independent.

Learn something NEW! It just keeps life fun. You dont even have to spend money to do it if you don't want to. I just looked up computer codes in high school to learn how to do up my social sites & I have people messaging me like crazy to help them. They think it's confusing but it's second nature to me on some things. Plus I met quite a few people doing this. Then when that got boring, I started beta reading (which is proofreading someone's writing to correct mistakes & offer suggestions). There's free stuff/low cost activities to do in communities too. I'm taking a $25 six week course on City Services. I've met the police, city manager, city clerks, toured our brand new fire house & next week I go to public works!

Be assertive. It can/will save your life. So many doctors write off women as worries but who knows your body better than you? YOU live in it! If they won't listen, get a second opinion, even if the doctor "gets mad". They may have a bruised ego but you will still be alive & seeking better medical care. Same goes with legal issues. Do you know how many women end up dead because their police force or judges refuse to believe them?

Love yourself. I think this is the most important thing on my list. How can you love someone else or have them love you if you don't love yourself. You are priceless & deserve good things in life, don't ever let someone tell you different!!
What would you add to this list?

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Be Love

Jason Mraz has a tattoo on his forearm that says "Be Love." In his own words, this is the meaning behind it: 

"“Be Love” is a bold declaration. It’s about choosing kindness over being right. It’s about cutting out the conditions in which you might think are required for love and going straight to the source, or rather, being the source yourself, that which is Love, unconditional."

I want to be love above everything else. Love is my religion, my hope, my reason for each breath. But not only to receive it, but to give it, with every ounce in me. When someone hurts, I hurt. Empathy runs thick in my veins. 

"I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it," - Audrey Hepburn.

These people are people I try to model my life after. Positive role models are seemingly hard to find in today's society where the general consensus is that everyone is looking out for themselves in the worst way possible.

Granted, I try to look out for myself, but in a much more open and loving way. Which basically means that I look out for myself eventually. It's just how I am. I help others first and then I help myself. But right now, as far as relationships's me time. It's not selfish, it's just knowing what I need to be able to help others. Love yourself before you can love another. Be love. 

That's what I think every warrior queen should do. Love herself (himself). Be love. Share the love. 

love love love

P.S. Tomorrow is International Women's Day.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Bad Ass Chick

"Either that belongs to a really gay guy with a penis issue, or that is one bad ass chick!"

It belongs to one bad ass chick. Namely, me.
The item in question was my 1988 Toyota Pick Up truck that is lifted, has a roll cage, a ram bar and five point seatbelts. The back window says "Polly Pocket," thus leaving the person wondering the gender of the driver.

I love my truck. It is the embodiment of me in a vehicle. Not too many people can say that, I'm pretty sure. I'm not sure how I got so lucky or if maybe I'm just crazy for drawing all of these parallels and over-thinking my truck.

This also got me thinking about the stereotype of trucks being a "man's vehicle" for men work. If I needed too. I could haul a lot of things. I've towed a truck twice my size out of being stuck in Glamis. My truck isn't for the weak-hearted. ;)

Also, oddly enough, a lot of my girl friends are total truck / suv girls. We have 3 red trucks and 3 white trucks. It's totally adorable and we should totally have a truck road trip. The rest of the girls (for the most part) have a Monterra or Explorers or some other large vehicle that kicks ass.

I want the decal that says "Silly Boys, Trucks are for girls" along with the license plate frame that says "This is not my boyfriend's truck." Clearly, I am into gender bending. I like what I like and I don't care if it's what is traditionally considered a "manly" pastime. Dirtbiking? Check. Motor Races? Check. Mountain biking? Check. Cars (working on them, etc)? Check.

I want to know everything.

Of course, I have my fair share of girly activities (baking, dancing, painting my nails, shopping, tea parties, etc). But bending the stereotypes of what should be considered male and what should be considered female is a lot of fun. When I say that I'm different, I mean it. Everyone's different, when you get to the core of it. No person is made exactly the same.

Warrior Queens find who they are and they strive to keep that. They find similarities amongst people and they love and cherish those all while they are loving who they are.

That's what a warrior queen does. She loves herself over all else.

P.S. I am so happy I have my truck back. It's like this major part of me was missing and is no longer gone.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Panic Attacks

I know I've been severely failing at writing my own blogs right now, I have a long list of blogs that I want to write but an even longer list of homework assignments to do and those come first. So in the meantime, here's another article that I found!!

All people will feel anxious and stressed out at one point or the other. However, if you are experiencing what doctors refer to as panic attacks, then what you have is a truly serious problem. People who experience panic attacks on a regular basis will have symptoms like trembling, abdominal pain, dizziness and shortness of breath to name a few. There are even some who have gone to emergency rooms thinking that what they are having is actually a heart attack.

The physical signs and symptoms of anxiety attacks may not be that life threatening. However, such symptoms can leave a devastating impact in your life since they can keep you from driving a vehicle, being productive at school or work, interacting with other people and so on. Written in this article are a couple of ways that can help you in terms of controlling panic attacks.
1) Single out the possible triggers. Each person is an individual. With that said, the things that might be triggering the attacks may vary from one person to the other. Try to identify what is causing the onset of attacks, so you could steer away from them or possibly prepare yourself beforehand, so you could better cope and deal with them. 
2) Learn relaxation methods. Yoga, breathing techniques, deep meditation can help you remain composed, focused and calm.
3) Avoid drinking coffee. If your goal is to cure panic attacks, stay away from diet pills, soda, coffee and other caffeinated beverages. Caffeine is considered a stimulant and can aggravate your CNS or central nervous system which can trigger the occurrence of an attack.
4) Acquire plenty of rest. Not having enough shut eye can make you feel stressed out which in turn makes you more prone to having attacks.
5) Workout regularly. Exercising promotes the release of healthy endorphins into your bloodstream and will give you that natural sense of ecstasy. When you are happy, you limit the chances of attacks from occurring.

Do you get panic attacks? How do you handle them?

Post contributed from

Tuesday, March 2, 2010


On my xanga, I follow a series of blogs about things that interest me like datingish, lovelyish, ireallylikefood, and healthkicker. They always seem to have really interesting posts from a bunch of different people, which is how I wish this blog was and how I wish for the magazine to be. Anyway, I was all set to write a satirical blog when I discovered this. We talked about this in my psych of women class tonight.  The satire will have to wait till tomorrow. Enjoy:

Having low self esteem really effects all aspects of your life particularly your love relationships. Low self esteem is also a vicious circle: you start to actually believe your value is less than it actually is. Why? Because you're starving for the love, support and attention you need. You're at a point where you will take any relationship to fill that void even if it is not the best for you. "Something is better than nothing" is your mindset. It does not have to be this way though.

Low self esteem self help starts with taking a personal inventory of yourself and admitting you have a problem. Are you passive and not always standing up for yourself when you should? Do you have trouble accepting compliments from others? For example, when someone says your hair looks great, do you say “thanks,” or do you say “you don’t have to lie, I know it does not look that good”?  Do you think you have no control over anything in your life? If you said yes to more than one of those, you might suffer to some degree of low self esteem.
So how can you improve your self esteem fast?
For starters, you must stop talking negatively to yourself. If you do not like you, why should anyone else? If you can not compliment yourself, why should anyone else? Love yourself first, be your biggest fan.
Next, face your personal flaws head on and do not avoid them. If you know that you lack confidence, then admit it to yourself so you can start working on it. It is sometimes painful to admit our shortcomings, but by getting them out in the open, you learn to accept that some areas of your life need improvement, and can now take the next step of making life changes. When making these changes, it is best to fake it until you make it so to speak. If you want to be a more confident person, then think about how a confident person acts, then start doing that.  At first you will be faking it, but eventually, you will become a more confident person.

How do you keep your self esteem up? What do you do to perk yourself up?

Post contributed from  << and healthkicker

Monday, March 1, 2010

a simple compliment

I just wanted to share a really awesome compliment I got today:

"I'm so proud of you, babe, because, no matter what happens, no matter how sad you get or how fucked over you get, you seem to always stay positive and you always keep your eye on your goals." - Jeffy 

Thank you, <3

A Letter to Myself

Dear Raewyn,
I hate to break the news to you but you can't excel at everything. Not only that, but you can't DO everything. It's probably rather detrimental to your health. Especially when you want straight A's over all else. Don't talk to boys, that will just make it more complicated. You have far too much on your plate: work, school, internship, friends, newsletters, baking, painting...not to mention do you ever have time to read anymore? No. You're too busy doing everything. Don't try and learn bridge right now, that's going to kill you. Save your brain space for something better, like writing blogs everyday! Why don't you just fine-tune your abilities instead of trying everything?

P.S. I tell myself this almost everyday. I never listen.
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