Overcoming fears

I've been going to Glamis since I was 11 or 12 but we really didn't get into going and playing in the sand until 8th grade. We went every holiday weekend from October until April. I didn't have a quad for the first year - I just always rode in my Papa Buddy's buggy or sometimes my friend LaLa and I would switch off riding her Honda 250EX (which later became my first quad).

When I started going I was a lot less confidnent in a lot of things. I was social but could usually be found reading a book. I was me but I was always such a scaredy cat. Every top of a "baby" dune I would cry, terrified to go down. [[I'm not sure why I'm always scared to go down things. I love going up! Up rock climbing walls, up dunes, up trees, up ladders, up up up!!)

But going back down...yeah about that. I cried. I refused to go down. I was stubborn. I threw fits.

Then we went to Idaho and my aunt was very into video-taping the trip. We were goofing off, going through bowls and up! As per usual, when my dad tried to make me go back down...I threw a fit. Caught. On. Tape. We watched it that night, I was excited and completely oblivious to the fact that they caught me on tape freaking out.

I was completely MORTIFIED.

no way was that me...only it was...

From that moment on I decided, "Fuck it! I can do it!" I knew they weren't going to lead me through something that I wasn't going to be able to handle. So when I got started to get scared I would sing to myself while I road. Usually Josie and the Pussycats. No, I don't know why. Oddly enough, it worked.

After I decided to put my big girl panties on, I stopped crashing too. who knew having confidence in myself would lead to me being a safer rider?

These days I don't have to sing. I don't hesitate at all. When in doubt, gas it. I think I took this philosophy to other aspects of my life. When I'm scared, I forge ahead. There is no longer anything I'm too scared to do. Jump my quad? No prob. Climb something and go back down...I'll be scared but I'll do it. I'll even light a fire if I have to.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, it takes something simple like seeing myself freak out, to be determined and not give up. Of course, it's a lot harder to stick with that decision. But confidence usually builds pretty quickly when you realize you can do it.